As a former UK police officer with 21 years of service, I’ve witnessed firsthand how our minds become storage rooms, each traumatic experience neatly packed away like a suitcase. For every emergency worker—be it a police officer, paramedic, or firefighter—these suitcases represent moments of extreme emotion: a death, a suicide, an attack on a colleague, or the heartbreaking task of informing someone that their loved one has been killed. We pack these suitcases deep in the back of our minds, close them tight, and stack them away as we move on to the next crisis. It’s what we do, even though what we face is beyond the normal human experience.
Research shows that emergency workers are exposed to extreme situations far more frequently than the general public, and this takes a significant toll on their mental health. For instance, a report by the Police Federation of England and Wales revealed that 1 in 5 police officers in the UK experience symptoms of PTSD, and many more suffer from anxiety and depression. Similar issues affect ambulance workers, with a study published by The British Medical Journal*finding that over 50% of paramedics in the UK have faced mental health problems related to their work. Firefighters are not exempt; according to research by Mind, 85% of firefighters** in the UK have experienced stress and poor mental health at work, and 37%have even contemplated suicide.
At the time, you’re just focused on the job. You don’t think about those suitcases; you’re too busy. But over the years, they begin to accumulate, layer upon layer. Each suitcase contains the weight of a moment you had to handle and then quickly move past. You don’t realise it, but they’re there, stacked up in your mind—until one day, something forces them open.
Death of a relative opened my suitcases
For me, it wasn’t until years after I had retired from the police, with a decade of retirement behind me, that my suitcases began to burst open. A family tragedy—the senseless stabbing of my young cousin’s son, Tashan Daniel, on his way to an Arsenal football match—triggered this. I attended the trial and watched the CCTV footage with his grieving family. And boy, did that rip open some suitcases, even ones I hadn’t thought about in decades. I found myself haunted at night, thinking about things I had dealt with 20 years ago. What surprised me most was the clarity of the memories in those suitcases. I couldn’t remember what I had for dinner a few days ago, but the contents of those suitcases were vivid, packed with every detail.
The truth is, only someone who’s carried similar suitcases can fully understand the weight of them. The danger of leaving these suitcases packed away for too long is that they don’t just go away; they build pressure, and when they finally burst open, the consequences can be severe. Unseen mental anguish can lead to chronic anxiety, depression, substance abuse, and even suicide. These aren’t just statistics—they’re real outcomes that many emergency workers face when the weight of their suitcases becomes too much to bear.
Now, in retirement, I’ve found solace in opening those suitcases with former colleagues, unpacking the together, and recognizing that they’re there. It’s a form of unburdening, a way to lighten the load. But it’s a process that needs to happen earlier, before the weight becomes unbearable.
I’ll never forget one extreme event from my time as a young sergeant. I took some probationers to a particularly harrowing scene—a young woman’s suicide. The oldest guy on my team, a seasoned cop with 29 years of service, came along too. He was the type who always had a roll-up cigarette stuck to his lip, with a dry sense of humor and a casual attitude toward even the most gruesome situations. At the scene, members of the public were screaming, and one person even fainted as we cordoned off the area. I remember thinking that the public was understandably shocked, but as police officers, we had to be strong, to handle it.
Afterward, I ran a debrief, urging the younger officers to talk about what they’d seen and offering occupational health referrals. Everyone left the room except for the veteran cop. He quietly shut the door and, to my surprise, started to cry into his hands. It wasn’t the young officers who had been most affected—it was the old-timer whose suitcases had finally overflowed. This moment taught me that no one, no matter how experienced or tough, is immune to the effects of carrying these hidden burdens.
A quote from *Mind’s* Blue Light Programme, which focuses on mental health in emergency services, resonates with this: “Emergency service workers are exposed to traumatic incidents far more frequently than the general public, and this can have a profound effect on their mental health. It’s vital that these workers have access to support whenever they need it.”
The message I want to share is simple: those suitcases exist, whether you acknowledge them or not. You might think you’re tough enough to handle anything, but the reality is that no one is immune. The effects of unseen mental anguish are real and can be devastating if left unchecked. Find someone to talk to, someone who understands what it’s like to carry those suitcases. Open them up before they burst open on their own, because the longer you wait, the heavier they get.
If you are an emergency worker or know someone who is, please pass this message on. They may be busy collecting suitcases, but let them know—don’t leave them packed away for too long. Addressing these issues early on is not a sign of weakness but a necessary step to ensure that these burdens don’t overwhelm them in the future.
Here are some important resources that highlight the mental health challenges faced by emergency workers:
– *Police Federation of England and Wales*: [1 in 5 police officers experience PTSD](https://www.polfed.org/mental-health).
– *The British Medical Journal*: [Over 50% of UK paramedics face mental health issues](https://www.bmj.com/content/371/bmj.m4352).
– *Mind*: [85% of firefighters experience poor mental health at work](https://www.mind.org.uk/news-campaigns/news/firefighters-mental-health-at-risk-while-on-the-job-mind-reveals/) and [37% have contemplated suicide](https://www.mind.org.uk/news-campaigns/news/firefighters-mental-health-at-risk-while-on-the-job-mind-reveals/).
These findings collectively illustrate the profound mental health challenges faced by police officers, paramedics, and firefighters due to their frequent exposure to extreme situations. Addressing these challenges requires comprehensive mental health support and efforts to reduce the stigma associated with seeking help.
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These findings collectively illustrate the profound mental health challenges faced by police officers, paramedics, and firefighters due to their frequent exposure to extreme situations. Addressing these challenges requires comprehensive mental health support and efforts to reduce the stigma associated with seeking help.
https://www.policecare.org.uk/
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